I’m not a writer

I’ve been thinking a lot lately. And Davidson has helped me with his insights.

I realize I’ve been putting too much pressure on myself into being a writer. Whenever I had to answer to the question, “So what do you do?” I’d find it hard to say, “I’m a writer.” or simply “I write books.” Because then it invites other uncomfortable questions like, “How many sales did you have so far?” or, “Are you making a living out of it?” or, “How much do you earn?”

Davidson has opened my eyes last night and told me that I spend most of my time caring for others: Ellie, himself, my parents,…

I’m a stay-at-home mom and a loving housewife.

Writing only comes next.

So next time I’ll have the question again, my answer will be, “I’m a stay-at-home mom and I write on the side.” It’s the reality. My reality.

I never felt comfortable saying “I’m a writer” simply because I’m not one. I’m a stay-at-home mom above all, who cares for her family. That’s my main job. And actually, it doesn’t even feel like a job.

Maybe someday I’ll become a famous author. Maybe I won’t. It doesn’t matter, as long as I can keep doing what I love: taking care of my loved ones.

I thought I had to have a career to feel fulfilled in my life.

But I never considered that actually, my job as a mom already fulfills me. After all, that’s all I ever wanted: being a stay-at-home mom and working on the side.

Maybe in 20 to 30 years time, I’ll have built a foundation strong enough to turn my writing into an actual career.

Who knows?

All I know is that right now, what’s important to me is to take care of my family and to continue writing on the side.

It doesn’t change our plans to translate First I was Naive into Brazilian Portuguese nor merging our two websites into one.

What changes is the way I see my life. I see it from a different filter. A filter that makes me happy and connected with myself. I’m aligned with who I am. There’s no more struggle. No more resistance. I accept what is.