Can self-confidence be improved, or there is nothing that can be done about it?
Do you find it difficult to become a self-confident person? Are you working to improve your self-confidence but don’t know if it can be done?
Actually, you may be surprised to know that self-confidence can be increased in just 2 minutes.
If you pay enough attention, you’ll realize that self-confident people usually follow some patterns in their postures. You can quickly recognize a self-confident person just because of how he/she stands, sit and walk, don’t you?
So, we know that feeling self-confident produces specific postures. Nothing extraordinary here.
However, research has proved that the opposite is also true. That is, if you force yourself into these postures of self-confident people, you will feel confident.
And it’s not only a psychological effect. Research shows that forcing yourself into those postures for only 2 minutes actually raises your levels of testosterone (a hormone that makes you feel confident) and decreases the levels of cortisol (a hormone that makes you feel stress).
You can find more information about this technique in the video below, a Ted Talk by Amy Cuddy:
So, whenever you feel like you lack self-confidence, all you have to do is these so-called “power postures” for 2 minutes and you’ll feel better.
Then, you can do the next step, which is making decisions
The reason why the lack of self-confidence is so annoying is because it stops us from doing stuff we want to do. However, we fail to understand that self-confidence is not really needed for us to take action. All that it takes is to make a decision. Just tell yourself “I’m gonna do this no matter what” and do it even if you feel like shit.
Back in February 2016, I decided to go on an adventure with Shyrwyn, by hitchhiking from Brazil to Peru. However, there were two problems:
- I was terrified of talking with unknown people;
- Shyrwyn didn’t speak Portuguese, so she could not help, and was depending on me.
I remember when we were at a gas station to ask for out first hitchhike. I was petrified. The idea of asking for a ride and getting rejected was scary as hell.
However, I did not give myself an option. I just said, “I’ll do it, no matter how long it takes, I’ll do it.”
And guess what? I did it!
Do you think I was feeling confident?
Hell no! I was not only afraid but also ashamed of being afraid. I was imagining how pathetic I was looking in front of Shyrwyn, and it was terrible!
So, if I wasn’t feeling confident, how I managed to take action?
Because I decided I would take action, no matter what.
We are led to believe that we can only do some stuff if we’re feeling confident about it, but this is false. You do what you decide to do. Being self-confident makes it easier, but it doesn’t matter how much you lack self-confident, you can always take action.
In short:
- Use power postures to feel more confident;
- Decide to do what you want to do, no matter what, and then do it even if you don’t feel confident about it.
Extracted from my answer to a question asked on Quora.